This was a rough year for my reading. In the first 2.5 months of the year, I did most of my reading on public transit, to and from work. It’s about an hour each way, so that’s about 2 hours of reading a day, 5 days a week, unless I spend part-to-most of a trip staring at my phone. In March, due to the COVID-19 pandemic, I started working from home. I had to create new habits around my reading, which was difficult. My schedule shifted so I didn’t leave myself time to read during the morning before work, because I didn’t have to commute further than my kitchen table. I went for walks on my lunch during the summer to say that I left the house, or after work since in the Pacific Northwest, it’s daylight for a very long time from about May – September. I still read a great deal, more than last year, with some 65 books, but it took more effort than previous years.
When I was able to focus, after the pandemic started, I floated from book to book, not finishing anything. I read in June, July, and August, but only finished one book in June, and one in late August. I purchased books to support my local bookshops, and still haven’t finished them, even though they’re by authors I like! I also abandoned more books this year than in the past three years. Though, some of that was in the spirit of what I told myself I was going to do last year, which was to read things that made me happy. There were books I read this year that I adored, including a duo of books for which I am a legitimate fanboy for! I’ve gone looking for fanart, bought friends a copy, and passed along my copy to friends. Yet, there were also books that left me cold, that filled the time, that I put pressure on myself to read, to like, to have an opinion on.
I read a lot of Graphic Novels to start the year, but finished strong with Sci-Fi. I found myself drawn to poetry, something I hadn’t read for pleasure since college. I tried to tackle my to-read list, but wound up just adding more things to it, as I found more interesting voices in science fiction and fantasy. I read about 50/50 women and non-binary authors to men authors. I read primarily white authors, just 9 authors of color. Yet, many of those authors were writing women, non-binary characters, and had characters of color. I started tracking illustrators separately from authors of the graphic novels and noticed that the illustrators were typically more diverse, and perhaps therefore had more control over who wound up in the panels of those graphic novels.
More than anything else this year though, I was anxious. My main feeling around the pandemic was the feeling of waiting, of anxiety. I was bad at giving myself realistic projects. Instead, I fretted, I worried, I doomscrolled, and anxiety spiraled. My anxiety has never been worse, I began having intrusive thoughts about self-harm. I never acted on those thoughts, but the mental break of reading words, of imagining a world different than this one, where people did things, where leadership could be recognized, they helped alleviate my anxiety, helped me disappear, and for a little while, it was like being a kid again, galloping through stories of derring do. Reading helped me escape my ever mounting anxiety. Some books were bad for my anxiety, books about real people dying, especially as during the fall, the surge every expert predicted did in fact happen. Yet my favorite books of the year were about Necromancy, about confronting death, confronting destiny, and thinking about how you want to live, about finding the small joys, the small graces, and treasuring them. Many of the books that I loved this year were also about valuing ones’ self, enough to not take yourself too seriously, but also making sure that everyone treated you seriously, as a worthwhile person. These books are about striking out for yourself, finding and embracing the self that you wanted to be, and sticking to your principles when the chips were down. These characters changed, developed, and made me hope that after this wretched year where we waited and waited for some sort of relief, that we could also be the architects of our own salvation.
Favorites:
Gideon the Ninth and Harrow the Ninth, by Tamsyn Muir: Two parts of a planned three part series about lesbian necromancer dirtbags in a big fantastic world. The sequel is totally different, makes you question everything that came before, and then reframes everything so it makes sense. I desperately want to re-read these and need to give myself permission to do so. My favorites, bar none, of the year. A really fun narrative voice too. Definitely feels like the promise of a Millennial/Generation Z author incorporating memes for fun.
The Raven’s Tower, by Ann Leckie: A thoughtful fantasy novel about belief, long-term relationships, and identity, told in a unique voice. Devotes a surprisingly large amount of world building to a one-off novel. This made me want to finish Leckie’s Ancillary series.
Ninth House, by Leigh Bardugo: Ever feel like those Ivy League schools have something fishy going on? This literalizes Yale’s non-fraternity “Houses” into actual magical fraternities that have real world implications. The Ninth House is supposed to keep track of the other eight, but of course things go wrong. Fascinating class implications, and I’m excited to see where future books in this world go.
The Left Hand of Darkness, by Ursula K. LeGuin: This book has been on my to-read list forever. After my positive experiences with The Wizard of Earthsea, I took the plunge. I am grateful for it, as this was surprisingly globe trotting, surprisingly positive, and about the internal change required to see people differently. I really appreciated this, and really should read more LeGuin.
Cryptonomicon, by Neal Stephenson: A longtime favorite of mine that I re-read this year, in need of comfort. It still holds up as an adventure yarn. I used to understand the math and coding, but some of it went above my head this time.
Longitude, by Dava Sobel: One of the only non-fiction books as a favorite, but this history of establishing Longitude is an adventure yarn, but also explores how science and economics and pride all combined, and sometimes how fickle the monarchy were with tolerating science. It also charts the difficult of fucking finding all the stars in the sky, which is sort of amazing, when you think about it.
Wage Slaves, by Daria Bogdanska: Really enjoyed this graphic novel. It’s thoughtful, and talks about union politics in a way that is accessible, but doesn’t romanticise them, personalizes how you bring people together, but also highlights an underseen part of society that I feel that Americans can sometimes glamorize: Europe is amazing and everyone has benefits. This breaks that open and critizes some of these systems for the ways that they continue to fail people, or cause undue struggle.
Get in Trouble, by Kelly Link: Short stories by a master. Obviously I liked some more than others, but after each one was over, I had to close the book to relish how good each story was. Not a false note in the book.
Cinderbiter, by Martin Shaw and Tony Hoagland: Celtic poems retranslated and readapted by a poet and storyteller for oratory. Some glorious images here that reminded me why I was attracted to poetry in college: the rhythm, the images, and turns of phrase that evoke mood. I bought my friend Jeremy a copy.
Beowulf, translated by Maria Dhavana Headley: Bro, this is a well translated poem for a modern audience, has great kennings, and I agree with Headley’s translator notes about monstrous women. Also bought a fair few friends this.
All Systems Red, by Martha Wells: I love Murderbot. Funny, fast-paced, and cleverly uses sci-fi tropes. The latest thing I read.
Hated/Disappointed:
The Silent Patient, by Alex Michelades: I thought this was just ludicrously plotted, and the narrator’s voice was wheedling and thin
The Manhattan Projects, Vol 1-2, by Jonathan Hickman: Just morally ugly, with ugly art to boot
The Atlas of Cursed Places, by Oliver La Carrer: Pretty racist, not gonna lie
Dirt, by Bill Buford: I loved Heat, but Bill Buford’s exploration of France cooking is somehow morbid, tepid, and draining.
Graphic Novels:
The Legend of Vox Machina, by Matthew Colville: Good, if you like Critical Role, which I do
The Unbeatable Squirrel Girl Vol 1-4, by Ryan North: I find that I need small doses of Ryan North’s voice. I got tired of it by volume 3.
Ms. Marvel Vol 1-3, by G. Willow Wilson: liked, and intended to read more, but the pandemic.
Giant Days Vol 5-8, by John Allison: I love John Allison’s characters, world, but need to re-acquaint myself with everything here.
Coda, Vol 1-2, by Simon Spurrier: Intriguing world, rendered in an interesting way, with a boring story.
Monstress Vol 4, by Marjorie Liu: This series is so dense, I feel like I need to re-read everything every time a new one of these drops.
I Roved Out in Search of Truth and Love, by Alexis Flower: The best porn comic out there.
Seattle Walk Report, by Susanna Ryan: Cute! Encourages you to walk more. I concur.
Mean Girls Club, by Ryan Heschka: This is a near favorite for me. It really works with it’s chosen 40s-50s pulp genre in terms of writing, and style.
Estranged, by Ethan Aldridge: Great YA, recommend for those readers.
The Wicked and the Divine, Vol 1-3 by Kieron Gillan: Pretty, but also felt disposable? I was intrigued until I set the books down and then all urgency to finish them left me.
The Green Hand and Other Stories, by Nicole Claveloux: Ugly in a beautiful way.
The Case of the Missing Men, by Kris Berten: If you crossed the Hardy Boys/Nancy Drew with David Lynch, and set it on Canada’s eastern sea board. Recommended!
Everything Else:
How to Invent Everything, by Ryan North: I wish I absorbed more of this.
Hollow Kingdom, by Kira Jane Buxton: Fun local fare, pushed by the library and later discussed a book club. But the themes are all on the surface, not much else is going on there.
The Bear and the Nightingale, by Katherine Arden: Straightforward re-telling of Eastern European/Russian folktales. I liked Naomi Novik’s take on these more.
Home Cooking, by Laurie Colwin: Recipes and thinking and writing about food from a New York woman writer. I still think about this sometimes.
Happy All the Time, by Laurie Colwin: A very silly, very 70s romance.
In The Woods, by Tana French: A well written thriller set in Ireland. I quite liked this, it was very twisty.
The Stranger in the Woods, by Michael Finkel: The true tale of a hermit. I’ve thought about this from time to time over the course of the pandemic. I sincerely believe he was a true hermit.
The Haunting of Tram Car 015, by P. Djeli Clark: Interesting concept, but felt slightly underwritten as a novella/long short story. Did enjoy the Middle Eastern fantasy.
The Refrigerator Monologues, by Catherynne Valente: Superheroines and villains from their point of view. Damning for the original authors.
Treasure Island, by Robert Louis Stevenson: Still holds up, and has teeth! I’ve always loved a sea-faring adventure.
River of Teeth by Sarah Gailey: Hippo ranching and hippo cowboys in the Mississippi. Not quite as interesting as I wanted it to be, but still enjoyable.
How to Get Filthy Rich in Rising Asia, by Mohsin Hamid: This felt so much more pat, and less transformative than Exit West. I was disappointed by how straightforward this was.
How to Do Nothing, by Jenny Odell: I loved the long essay/presentation that this was based on. Bought right at the start of quarantine, and I felt like I maybe need to read it again without the pressure to absorb its messages.
Islands of Chaldea, by Diana Wynne Jones: Famed YA author that I had never read before. This was her last novel. Pretty good and prickly! I liked it.
The Black Tides of Heaven, by JY Yang: Interesting YA-ish exploration of gender, family, and belonging in a fantasy China/Asia setting. I liked it up until we started having a great deal of time skips. I wanted it to settle down a little more.
The Rise and Fall of D.O.D.O, by Neal Stephenson and Nicole Galland: Very enjoyable if you’re a Stephenson fan. Galland helps temper Stephenson’s love of systems by fleshing out more of the characters, especially the women. I liked it a great deal, even if it took me a long time to read.
My Sister, the Serial Killer, by Oyinkan Braithwaite: Propulsive, thorny, and deeper than it seems. This quick book helped break my non-reading, and I went on a tear of books after this. Thankful for this book, and encourage you to read it!
White Flights, by Jess Row: Thoughtful exploration of race in literary fiction.
Brute, by Emily Skaja: Very heavy poems about addiction, abusive relationships, self-revelations, and more.
Rebecca, by Daphne du Maurier: Pulpy fun.
Piranesi, by Susanna Clarke: I really enjoyed it was I was reading it, and Clarke’s voice is like no one elses. At the same time, it has not stuck with me the same way Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell did.
Empty Mansions: The Mysterious Life of Huguette Clark and the Spending of a Great American Fortune, by Bill Dedman and Paul Clark Newell Jr.: Less juicy than I really wanted it to be in part because Huguette was a shut in and didn’t really do anything interesting with her money, but at the same time, fascinating.
Bestiary, by Donika Kelly: Painful but well-written poems about race.
The People in the Castle, by Joan Aiken: Fascinating. Some of the stories were so-so, but many were quite good, and strange. Can definitely trace the through-line to Kelly Link.
Motel Pool, by Kim Fielding: M/M supernatural romance for book club. Overall, okay.
Resolutions:
Continue reading the things that I like! Be sure to share the things that I love with people earlier than this list, as that makes things more fun.
Word Choice 